Victoria: I’m scared. I’m going to be in agony!
Rodney: Oh don’t believe all that! I was there when Bernice was born – well, not actually in the room, I was outside waiting. But, well, she just popped out no trouble!
Victoria: Oh did she really?
Rodney: Yeah! Diane was smiling. It was a breeze!
Vanessa: I’m your vet, but I’m also your mate.
Moira: I know you are, sorry. I’m a silly cow.
Vanessa: Well, think of it as me treating two for the price of one.
Diane: It’s always been Des Lynam for me. The thought of his moustache in my proximity!!
Charity: Five seconds, that’s how long you’ve got to get out, or this ends in the woods, with a shovel.
Nicola [to Bernice]: And do you want to get married in a dress or knickers?
Liam: Do I get a vote?
Cain: I don’t know how Cain can bear to be around you.
Moira: Well maybe he’s found a way of getting his own back. Like, I don’t know, giving your mum one.
Vinny: If Lydia never knew she had the money, has she really lost anything?
Marlon: Yes, now is not the time to get existential, Vinny.
Bob: I’ve got tin foil! I’m not even sure why!
Mandy: Well well well, if it ain’t my favourite cousin sixteen times removed.
Rodney: How I enjoy overhearing my daughter planning which costume she’s going to have sex in…
